


T'Tony ficlets

by AlexTheShipper



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: BARF Technology, Ficlet Collection, Fluff, M/M, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Not Cap Friendly, Pet Cat, Saltmates, Team Appreciate Tony, Tony Stark Deserves Better, Tony Stark is Good With Kids, Tony Stark-centric, all of the characters - Freeform, captain asshole
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-12
Updated: 2017-04-25
Packaged: 2018-10-03 05:50:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10237262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexTheShipper/pseuds/AlexTheShipper
Summary: This is a collection of T'Tony ficlets1. Tony was under the impression T'Challa hated him. T'Challa was under the impression they were dating.2. Movie night is interrupted by the renegade Avengers, and the kids are not pleased.3. In which Peter and Kamala form #team appreciate Tony4. Saltmates AU5. Tony gets stuck in a tree attempting to rescue their cat.





	1. Pantera

“Why on earth are you crying?” Rhodey asks when he finds Tony attempting to tie his tie through bleary eyes. Tony punches his shoulder, careful not to make the man lose his balance in the process.

“I am not crying. I was just thinking about T’challa. He’s just so damn pretty dude, like have you seen him? He’s so damn pretty.” Tony explains, wrangling his tie into submission under Rhodey’s unimpressed gaze.

“Which explains the tears how?” Rhodey asks, thinning his lips slightly when Tony opens his mouth fully prepared to bullshit his way out of the room.

“What like nobody ever cries staring at beautiful art?” Tony defends, crossing his arms over his chest and attempting to slip around Rhodey. “Even if he hates me I can still look.” Tony shoots back, accidently showing his hand. Rhodey’s eyes widen in realization and Tony barely stops himself from backpeddling.

“Two things Tones. One, comparing a person to art is a little offensive. Just Saying. Like King T’challa is a person he’s not just there for your viewing pleasure.” Rhodey starts, and Tony blushes sheepish at the gentle scolding. “Two, he doesn’t hate you, why would you think that?”

“I have a list!” Tony defends, choosing to ignore the valid point that his attempt at bullshit was mildly offensive to focus on the invalid point that T’challa doesn’t hate him. Because he does. Tony knows this for a fact.

“Of course, you do.” Rhodey mumbles, as Tony scrambles about for his Stark phone to apparently pull up a list.

“Okay well first, there’s the fact that he’s housing Cap and Squad. Like they have to be talking shit about me all the time, and if they’re friends with him he’s gonna hate me.” Tony explains, adamant. Rhodey shakes his head, and pats Tony’s shoulder comfortingly. “Then there’s the fact that they probably told him I’d try to buy his affection because he doesn’t trust me to pay for anything.” Tony scowls at the memory of their last meeting to talk about the accords. T’challa had absolutely refused to allow him to pick up the tab and it stung.

“Or maybe he has more money than you and can pay for his own stuff.” Rhodey mumbles, unimpressed by Tony’s logic.

 “And, and, and, every time we meet for the Accords he always stares at me like I’m going to do something wrong Rhodey. I know they probably told him I was a backstabber.” Tony says, and his mind flashes back to Clint’s jab. “He doesn’t trust me.” Tony mutters, and Rhodey’s heart breaks for the ridiculous sad sack of a man in front of him.

“And here I thought I was staring at you because you’re so beautiful.” T’challa purrs from the door. The door which Rhodey would have been able to see that bastard. Tony shoots his friend a betrayed look. Rhodey looks away and whistles innocently rocking forward in the braces. “After all, why wouldn’t I focus on my date?” T’challa asks before Tony can decide whether or not to tackle Rhodey.

“Date?” Tony absolutely does not squeak, he is manly and he asks the question with dignity thank you very much Rhodey.

“Well of course, we’ve been dating for a month now, today’s our anniversary.” T’challa explains, and Tony’s jaw drops. They were dating? This whole time? He thought T’challa just wanted to meet about the accords.

“Oh gosh, I didn’t get you a gift.” Tony blurts, embarrassment flushing his cheeks. T’challa laughs beautifully, and Tony’s stomach drops out at the sight.

“That’s okay love, seeing as how you didn’t know we were dating I won’t hold it against you.” T’challa assures. Tony is weirdly relieved at the assurance that he hasn’t managed to ruin the relationship he didn’t know he was in. “I did however get you a gift.”

“You didn’t have to do that.” Tony replies, blushing when T’challa strides forward to kiss his cheek and pushes a small bundle of black fur into Tony’s arms. Which Tony definitely noticed prior to that moment. He just didn’t think it was important okay. The cat king carried a cat it wasn’t that weird, and it’s not like Tony was distracted by the fact that he was dating a king or anything.

“Of course, I did, as King, if I want to court you properly I have to provide you with gifts, and there is no greater honor than that which a cat can give.” T’challa informs Tony, who is stroking the little ball of fur with a shocked look on his face. The cat purrs. “She likes you.” Rhodey quietly exits the rooms, leaving them to their moment.

“Does she have a name, or do I get to name her?” Tony asks, rubbing the kitten’s ears gently. The kitten paws at his tie, and Tony pulls it loose so she can better play with it.

“She’s yours to name love.” T’challa assures him. Tony blushes bright red, and T’challa leans in bold in the face of Tony being adorable, and presses a soft kiss to his cheek. The kitten makes a swipe for his tie and Tony turns an even brighter red.

“Pantera.” Tony whispers. “It’s Italian for panther, to remind me of both you and my madre.” Tony explains, turning towards T’challa with a soft smile on his face.

“A beautiful name.” T’challa replies, and Tony leans up onto his toes, kitten held gently in his arms, and presses a kiss to T’challa’s lips.


	2. Family Movie Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Family movie night is interrupted by the renegade Avengers, and Tony and his squad of children wind up in a bit of a stare down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have never written this many character's in a scene, and I forgot about Sam Wilson until the last second because there are too many damn characters, but gosh I tried.

It was the first Friday of the month, which meant it was Mandatory Movie Night. They tried for ever week but the first Friday of the month was required, even T’challa came.

Tony was bullied out of his arm chair and onto the couch, Sarah Keener has sat herself in his lap, and Harley and Peter are squished together on his right leaving the left side open for Kamala to stretch out. T’challa snorts at Tony’s affronted look when the girl tucks her cold feet under his thigh. Cassie Lang, and Lila are seated on the floor, and Cooper Barton has stolen Tony’s arm chair, Nathaniel in his lap.

“Keep your cold toes off of me kid.” He scolds smacking at Kamala’s leg gently. Peter laughs to himself, ignoring the betrayed look Tony shoots his way. Choosing to ignore their antics, T’challa heads into the kitchen to make popcorn.

“Are my feet cold?” Sarah asks, twisting to press her toes against his arm, Cassie giggles into her hand, and Lila copies her.

“Jesus Christ yes, you tiny torturer. Someone get this child socks!” He exclaims trying to twist away. Harley snorts at that.

“Boss, I’m afraid the old codes have been used.” Friday informs him, and Tony stiffens. All heads swivel as eyes turn towards the elevator doors, with Peter climbing onto the back of the couch and mostly blocking Tony’s view. He can still hear the doors slide open though and he clutches at Sarah as she tries to climb out of his arms.  Surprisingly it’s Lila who gets to the renegade Avengers first, her determined little feet carrying her across the floor.

“Um, hello?” Steve asks, staring down at the furious little girl with confusion. Clint lights up when he sees her, but she ignores him in favor of kicking Captain America in the shin as hard as her little legs can manage.

“You’re a bully.” She announces. Tony’s heart near drops out of his chest, and he passes Sarah to Harley in his rush to get up.

“Don’t hurt her.” He requests ignoring the strain the sudden movement puts on his damaged ribs. Steve’s jaw drops.

“She’s my daughter!” Clint replies, indignant. Cooper shoots the man an unimpressed look in response to that, and Clint looks between his three kids baffled.

“Why don’t you go back to Wakanda and leave us alone?” Cooper asks, and Natasha looks surprised at that. Cooper has always loved having his father home. Clint doesn’t respond, taking an uneasy step towards Cooper, who curls tighter around Nathaniel, as Tony pulls Lila into his arms, and away from the shocked team Cap.

“Cooper, take Lila.” Tony asks, backing up to the arm chair. Lila crosses her arms, but doesn’t dare argue when Tony looks this stressed. In the space of a second Peter is on the roof and Kamala has placed herself firmly in front of Tony. Out of the corner of his eye he sees Cassie activate her distress signal.

“Stay back.” Kamala demands, and a small dot, starts to move across the floor as the others freeze.

“I will step on you.” Cassie informs the spot, passively. Tony winces, because wow harsh, and Scott appears on the floor.

“You no longer have visitation rights, in fact mom got a restraining order. You need to leave.” Cassie informs the man; the other Avengers look absolutely dumbfounded.

“Considering all of you are breaking multiple laws at the moment you all need to leave.” T’challa says from the doorway. Tony relaxes slightly, as Steve finally manages to pull himself together.

“I’m not a bully.” Steve blurts, stuck in the past as usual. Tony rubs at his nose trying to dissipate his forming headache.

“Why are you here Rogers?” Tony asks, before his kids can lash out again. Lila wraps herself around his leg.

“We need the BARF,” He makes a face at the name, but presses on. “Scott thinks it could help Bucky.” T’challa groans, glaring at the man in front of him. “We we’re going to come get it.”

“And what if he didn’t want to give it to you?” Peter demands, dropping off of the roof as T’challa positions himself between both groups. “We’re you going to beat him? Break the arc reactor with your shield? Leave him to freeze to death in a metal suit in Siberia? Oh, I’m sorry no those are things a bully would do.” T’challa shoots an approving look at the boy, and Tony flushes, embarrassed that his children feel a need to defend him.

“Or are you going to blame him entirely for things that are only partially his fault? Are you going to treat him like a villain for wanting to be held accountable for his actions?” Kamala demands, and Tony winces. “Are you going to stand by while a god attempts to choke him? Intentionally trigger his PTSD?” She shoots Wanda a look at that one, and Tony flinches. “Oh no, those are the actions of a bully aren’t they?” The emergency elevator’s doors slide open, and a group of heavily armed women pour out.

“You are under arrest.” Laura Barton informs them. Maggie hangs back as a few shield agents cautiously enter the building. Tony gestures for the kids to move away, pulling on the watch gauntlet.

“T’challa?” Steve asks eyes wide. T’challa frowns at the man.

“You have broken into my husband’s home with malicious intent.” T’challa states placidly. At this point, Tony, would have thought them incapable of surprise, and yet they still looked shocked.

“What are you even doing here?” Clint demands, knocking an arrow. Laura goes tense and levels a gun with his face.

“Movie night.” T’challa answers.

“Don’t make me shoot you in front of your children.” Laura says, voice hard. “If you fire one arrow in this room I will kill you. Clint’s eyes go wide and he lowers his bow.

“Honey?” Clint asks, trying to make her stance soften. Steve looks ready to fight but without the shield he’s reduced to short range and nobody’s close enough yet. Laura tosses both Clint and Scott handcuffs.

“Get out of the way, we don’t want the children to get hurt and I can’t have you two distracting me.” Laura says, turning her gaze to Natasha. “Will you put your godchildren in danger?” She asks, and Natasha sends the kids a look. She moves suddenly and the SHIELD agents tense as Wanda falls to the ground, knocked out.

“Never Laura, you know that.” Natasha replies taking the cuffs she’s handed and slipping them on. Before Steve can really respond she hits a pulse point on his neck and his knees give out. Sam Wilson surrenders with Laura’s gun pointed at his face. The shield agents are wary as they move closer getting all of them in what Tony has dubbed, Stark’s super soldier bondage gear. Nobody else will call it that, but hey. That’s what he named it. Wanda’s are enchanted by Stephan Strange to nullify her abilities. In ten minutes, they’re out of his tower.

“Well that was fun.” Cooper mumbles, and the other kids all laugh awkwardly as their parents wrap them up in tight hugs.

“I know it’s supposed to be the parent’s night out, but what about we all watch the movie tonight?” Tony asks, they end up filling the living room, Moana playing on the television as they quietly eat their popcorn.

Tony realizes he hasn’t been this happy in a long time. It’s nice, he glances up at T’challa. Really nice.


	3. Mudikani

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter and Kamala form #team appreciate Tony.

“Thank you!” Peter cheers, practically leaping at Tony and wrapping him in a hug. Tony freezes, and it’s like hugging a statue, Peter steps back a moment later rubbing at his neck awkwardly. “Sorry, didn’t mean to jump on you like that. I just really really love the new suit upgrades you are the best Dr. Stark.” His voice shifts into a slightly more professional tone at the end.

“Tony.” Tony corrects automatically, posture relaxing slightly. “And it’s fine Spiderling. No need to get all mushy about it.” Peter frowns at that and pulls on the suit gently, feels the way it still stretches to allow movement.

“Tony then, yes I need to get mushy. Vibranium costs a fortune like 10,000 dollars a gram not to mention all the time you spent in actually getting it to function, and give me free range of movement. From the bottom of my heart thank you.” Peter says, and he pulls Tony into another hug, the genius melts into it.

“I haven’t been thanked in years.” Tony mumbles too soft for a normal human to hear. Peter blanches internally, but just clings to Tony tighter. The genius eventually pulls away.

“Well that’s enough of that, I still have to finish Kamala’s new suit.” He announces, clearing his throat awkwardly. Peter nods at the obvious dismissal, and swings out the open window, he needs to find Kamala.

…

“Spidey! Hey what are you doing here?” She asks, slamming a would be mugger into a wall, and passing the wallet he’d grabbed back to the guy who looks like a biker.

“Came to show off my new duds, what do you think?” He asks, twirling slowly on his webs to show off. Kamala claps cheerfully, and the sirens go off at the end of the street.

“You good?” She asks the biker, he nods, and she grabs onto Peter allowing him to swing them to a nearby rooftop. “God that is so different from flying, I love it so much.” She smiles giddily at him.

“Dude, right?” He grins back, but then sobers. “Dr. St- Tony, is working on a suit upgrade for you.” Her face lights up at that, and Peter smiles. “I wanted to make a weird request.” She gestures for him to go on. “Will you hug him when he gives it to you, he said he hadn’t been thanked for years when I thanked him today.” He can see her heart breaking at that thought.

“Of course, I’ll hug him, I’ll hug him so much he’ll hate it. I’ll thank him for weeks.” She declares, dropping into a sitting position. “I hate them so much.” Peter hums in agreement.

“Years.” Peter mumbles, and he wonders if people ever thanked him for what he did back in 2012. Not the public, or the government, but the people he cared about.

“Do you think Pepper ever thanked him, after New York?” Kamala asks, like she’s reading his mind. He drops down next to her.

“I doubt it, she hates that he’s a superhero, I don’t see her thanking him for it.” Peter says, and Kamala groans dramatically slumping across his lap. “What about Rhodey?” Peter asks.

“For New York?” Kamala muses at the ground. “I don’t know, I know he never thanked him for the War Machine suit.” Peter’s jaw drops at that.

“That’s almost a billion dollars’ worth of electronics, which Tony tailor made to fit the man and he didn’t even say thank you?” Peter screeches. Kamala winces.

“He still thinks he stole it.” She offers, and Peter makes a noise not dissimilar to that of a dying cat. “We both know the Rogue Avengers never thanked him for shit. Assholes.” Kamala grumbles.

“We need to fix this. You take Pepper, I’ll take Rhodey?” Peter asks, Kamala laughs at him.

“She’s not that scary Pete.” Kamala says, and Peter shoots her the most incredulous look he can. “She’s not, she’s a badass lady though.” Well she is a badass, Peter agrees, but she’s also fucking terrifying. He gives her his best Puppy dog eyes. “Fine, you can tale Rhodey.” She grumbles, and he’s fairly certain that she whispers, “boys” under her breath.

…

Peter has no idea what Kamala told Pepper, but he’s very glad the window isn’t open because it seems that Pepper and Tony are talking things out, and Peter is not about to get in the middle of that, he scrambles down the side of the building in search of Rhodey’s rooms.

“Umm Colonel Rhodes?” He calls into the open window. Sliding over the sill at Rhodey rolls into the kitchen.

“What can I do for you kid?” Rhodey asks, and Peter pulls his mask off and takes a seat next to Rhodey to put them on the same level.

“Gosh, I did not think this through.” Peter mumbles, rubbing at his neck. Rhodey waits patiently an encouraging smile on his face.  “Why didn’t you thank Tony for the suit?” He blurts, because obviously that’s the best way to start this conversation. Rhodey’s smile drops, and Peter cringes.

“The circumstances around me getting the suit weren’t ideal.” Rhodey hedges, and Peter scowls at him not impressed by the flimsy excuse.

“So? It’s been years, and you went to MIT you have to know the suit was tailor built to fit you. It’s worth nearly a billion dollars.” Peter tries to hide his outrage, but honestly, he can’t believe this man. The Colonel looks stricken.

“You’re right, I’ve been avoiding opening up old wounds, for both of us.” Rhodey admits, clearly embarrassed by his own actions. Peter softens at the admission. “Still, that’s no excuse, I’ll thank him.” He looks up to the roof, a question clear on his face.

“Boss is currently busy.” Friday answers the unspoken question and Rhodey nods.

“Tell me when he’s next available.” Rhodey requests, and Peter grins.

“Thanks Fri.” Peter grins at the nearest camera, before returning his attention to Rhodey. “He said he hadn’t been thanked in years. I know I wasn’t supposed to hear it, but he does so much for you. I just, I don’t understand. He’s only known me a few weeks and I’ve had half a dozen reasons to thank him.” Rhodey looks stricken at that.

“Years?” He asks, and there’s a certain emptiness to his voice. Peter nods.

“He made my prosthetic a week ago.” He mumbles, and he realizes that the words thank you never left his lips. “I’m a horrible best friend.” Rhodey mumbles, and Peter rubs his back.

“I know I’m supposed to be comforting here. But yeah dude, you’ve been a bit of an ass. Now you just have to fix it.” Peter offers an unapologetic shrug. “How you do that is up to you, but I think a good starting place is probably a hug.” Rhodey sniffles, and panic overrides Peter’s concern, because og my god did he just make a colonel cry. Tony will kill him, Jesus Christ.

 “Hey kid don’t panic.” Rhodey states, patting his shoulder gently. “I’m fine, I just really need to talk to my Best Friend.” Peter stands up from his chair and jerks a thumb towards the window.

“Uh, I’m gonna just go I guess.” Peter blurts, and then leaps out the window. Kamala is probably laughing at him somewhere, but he did not plan to deal with a crying military man.

…

“Hello King T’challa.” Peter says, hands fluttering nervously as he debates bowing, Kamala props her elbow up on his shoulder.

“Sup?” She says, and Peter fights back a laugh. They thought they’d gotten to everyone Tony had in his close friend group, but then the man dropped the bombshell that him and King Kitty were dating. So, team appreciate Tony was back in action.

“Hello Mr. Parker, Ms. Khan.” T’challa says, inclining his head slightly in greeting. Kamala lights up at the show of respect, and Peter grins, loving when his best friend is happy.

“So, um we wanted to talk about Tony.” Peter offers, and Kamala pinches him before he can start rubbing at his neck. T’challa flashes his brilliant smile at them.

“If this is about your American ‘shovel talk’ I assure you Colonel Rhodes already gave it to me.” T’challa informs them. And Peter waves his hand to say sort of.

“Not exactly.” Kamala offers, and Peter is relieved to let her take point. “We know Rhodey will kick your ass to Wakanda and back if you screw this up King Kitty.” And maybe Peter isn’t so relieved, because that’s not how you talk to a king Kamala!

“Of course.” King T’challa agrees easily. And Peter relaxes at that. Kamala nods her approval at him.

“Well anyways, that’s not the point of this conversation. The point is you have to thank Tony for thinks.” She points at him, and Peter yanks her arm down before the Dora start to think she’s threatening the king.

“Of course, I would thank him, he’s my mudikani.” T’challa says, and the Wakandan word drips off his tongue like love. Kamala swoons a little.

“I ship it, we’re good. You’re a great guy Lion King!” She calls over her shoulder as she walks out. Peter bows awkwardly and races after her.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mudikani is a translation for lover I found, it’s Shona.


	4. Saltmates Ficbit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 500 or so words of Steve Tony Saltmates AU, with some T'Tony fluff

“Tony, we’re a team.” Steve says, holding his hand out like a peace offering. Tony almost takes it, almost allows himself to be sucked back in. His hand twitches at his side, but he stops. T’challa grins to himself, admiring his intended’s strength.

“No, we aren’t. You’re my saltmate Steve, we were never meant to be teammates.” He shakes his head, pressing his shoulder against T’challa’s a s a reminder. Steve scowls at him.

“You know that isn’t important, what is important is the good we can do together.” Steve argues, and Tony feels a cold fury in his bones, T’challa’s hands flex, as if searching for a knife.

“Steven Grant Rogers, just because you got a presidential pardon doesn’t mean the team is back. I will never work with this team again, it wouldn’t be safe, because, to be quite frank, I don’t trust a single one of you.” Tony replies, sliding his sunglasses on with one last disdainful glance. T’challa gives the Captain a unimpressed look. “I spent my entire young life failing to live up to your memory, and my adult life failing to live up to my fathers.” Tony says, and for a second worries that he’s shown his hand. He knoes T’challa will have noticed, and he’ll be concerned. “Then you came back, and I could never do anything right in your eyes. Well Captain, I’m done trying.” Steve crosses his arms unimpressed.

“You act like I’m the problem.” Steve says indignantly. Tony’s hand balls into a fist at his side, T’challa reaches out to grab his hand, and Tony slides his palm against T’challa’s relaxing. “I didn’t force you to make a murder bot.” Steve points out.

“It’s always back to that, isn’t it? The one thing I can never live down.” Tony gives a wry smile, turning to look at T’challa. “I’m tired T.” Tony says quietly.

“I think Peter probably made coffee, would you like to return to the tower?” T’challa asks, smoothly putting himself between Steve and Tony. Tony nods, squeezing T’challa’s hand in his.

“I like coffee.” Tony says, grinning at T’challa openly.

“What about the team?” Steve calls, as they begin to head for the door. T’challa shoots a chilling look over his shoulder, clearly unimpressed with the Captain, but he doesn’t get a chance to respond.

“Your team is not my problem Captain, I do not need to subject myself to your harsh criticism. I have a real family now.” He drags T’challa out of the room before either him or Steve can formulate a comment.

“You do, have a family with us that is.” T’challa clarifies as Tony climbs into the driver’s seat. The Dora frown at the action, clearly uncomfortable with Tony’s habit of driving himself around. Okeye climbs into the backseat, tense as a drawn bow as she watches Tony turn the key.

“Hell yeah I do. You, and Peter, and all of the guys. Maybe Bruce if he ever comes back from space.” Tony relaxes back into his seat, taking his sunglasses off, and offering T’challa a sincere smile. “Love you guys.

“And we love you.” Kamala calls from the backseat, in the process scaring Tony half to death.

“JESUS CHRIST! Why? Do you want to give me a heart attack?” He demands.

“Okeye knew I was here!”


	5. Mew In a Tree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony attempts to get their pet cat out of a tree, and winds up stuck himself.

“Tony Mew is stuck in the big oak tree again.” T’challa says, gesturing to the tree in the back yard. Tony looks up from his laptop and blinks at T’challa.

“I’ve seen you scale buildings, just go grab him.” Tony says, turning his attention back to his laptop. T’challa grabs the computer out of his hands. 

“I got Mew down the last three times, it’s your turn so put on your big boy repulsors and go fetch the cat.” T’challa demands, and Tony groans and drops a peck on T’challa’s cheek. 

“Fine, J grab my boots” Tony orders, and steps into them as they come flying towards his feet. He walks towards the back door with the best ass wiggle he can manage. T’challa laughs and follows him outside. 

“Mrrrow.” Mew stares balefully down at Tony, hair standing up on end. Tony’s heart melts seeing the little ball of anxiety. 

“I’m coming to get you stupid.” He assures the cat, and T’challa snorts. “What’s so funny?” Tony asks, activating the repulsors.

“Well, sometimes I can’t tell if you named the cat Mew or Stupid, and I wonder if she knows her own name at this point?” T’challa says still giggling. Tony laughs along, and flies up into the tree in an attempt to grab Mew.

“I also call her, Mewie, and Meowth.” Tony offers, and reaches into the branches to try and grab the cat who slides back towards the trunk. “Warning the tree may be damaged when I’m done.” Tony says.

“Just don’t set it on fire, please.” T’challa replies, and Tony feels a branch snag in the back of his shirt. 

“It’ll be fine.” He assures T’challa, and then he stops moving forward. He glances down to see the boot caught in the crux of two branches. Mew meows at him, and then jumps down from her branch landing gracefully on the ground. “You bitch!” Tony says, pointing angrily at the cat. “Do you see this?” He demands.

“Yes, that is a cat, not a dog Tony.” T’challa says placidly. “Now get back down here.” Tony attempts to pull his leg out but can’t get the leverage between the way his torso is trapped by the branch in his shirt, and the angle his knee is positioned in. 

“Um, I would love to do that.” Tony says, humming softly to cover up how awkward he feels. T’challa bursts out laughing.

“You’re stuck aren’t you?” He asks, as Mew prowls across the lawn towards him. Tony glares down at the cat.

“No, that would be stupid.” He grumbles crossing his arms over his chest. T’challa practically howls with laughter. 

“You are so stuck, do you need me to climb up and help you?” He offers between breathes, Tony glares at him.

“Maybe.” He admits, face red. T’challa takes one step forward and jumps, grabbing onto a branch and pulling himself into the tree. “Thanks.” Tony mumbles.

“I can see the headlines now.” T’challa teases. “Iron Man defeated by a tree.” Tony glares at him and tries to wiggle his way out of his shirt and get himself free, only succeeding in scratching his back.

“Ow.” He mumbles quietly, and T’challa drops a kiss on his forehead.

“Stop struggling darling, I’ll save you from the evil tree.” He replies, Tony groans, and glares at the cat below him. 

“I hate you.” He informs her, getting a soft meow in response. “I’m never living this down I hope you know that. It’s all your fault.” The kitten puffs out her chest as if proud. “I hate you.” He repeats. T’challa manages to free him from the branch in his shirt.

“No you don’t you love Mew.” T’challa replies, moving down to free Tony’s leg with a grace Tony could never hope to mimic. 

“I hate you too, making fun of me in my time of need. Rude.” Tony replies, crossing his arms over his chest. T’challa just laughs at him. 


End file.
